Family

Family photos with toddlers might be my favorite sessions. Toddlers are my favorite clients — and I mean that completely. The running, the refusing, the sudden and total meltdown over nothing — all of it is welcome in my sessions. In fact it’s exactly what I’m expecting.

If you’ve been putting off booking family photos because you’re not sure your toddler is ready, this post is for you. Here’s everything I tell my Bay Area families before we meet — and why I genuinely never worry about young kids at a session.

Why Family Photos with Toddlers Are Better Than You Think

Here’s something most people don’t realize: toddlers are incapable of performing for the camera. They don’t know how to pose, they don’t care about looking good, and they have absolutely zero interest in cooperating on demand. And that is the greatest gift they can give a photographer.

Every parent I photograph with a toddler says some version of the same thing before we start: “I’m so sorry in advance.” And every time, by the end of the session, they’re looking at the back of my camera with their hand over their mouth.

The photos that make parents cry — in the good way — are almost never the ones where everyone is looking at the camera and smiling. They’re the ones where the toddler is running full-speed toward the trees, where dad is chasing them mid-laugh, where mom is crouched down at eye level with this tiny wild person she made. When a toddler runs toward the water, squats down to inspect something in the grass, or dissolves into giggles for no apparent reason — those are the moments that become your favorite photos. Not the posed ones. The real ones.

What toddlers cannot do: sit still, perform on command, pretend they’re interested in something they’re not. What toddlers can do: run, explore, play, hug, tackle, point at things, narrate everything happening around them, and occasionally deliver a spontaneous kiss that makes a photo completely unforgettable. My job is to stay close and be ready when those moments happen.

This post is about what actually works when you’re photographing young children in the Bay Area — drawn from real sessions including a particularly memorable afternoon at the UC Berkeley Botanical Garden with a two-and-a-half-year-old.

Why the Berkeley Botanical Garden Redwood Grove Works So Well for Young Children

Location matters more than most parents realize when it comes to photographing toddlers. The right location gives young children somewhere to go — something to explore, something to touch, something to be genuinely curious about. And a genuinely curious toddler is a gift to a photographer.

The redwood grove at UC Berkeley Botanical Garden is one of my favorite locations in the entire East Bay for exactly this reason. The trees create a canopy of soft filtered light — dappled, cool, and incredibly beautiful to photograph in. The path winds through the grove with enough open space to move freely, enough texture to be interesting, and enough visual complexity to keep young children genuinely engaged.

For the family I photographed here, the two-and-a-half-year-old who needed convincing at the start of the session was absolutely in her element once we were moving through the grove. She had completely forgotten I was there — which is exactly when the best photos happen. You would never know from the images that there was any convincing involved at all.

A few practical things worth knowing if you’re considering this location: the grove is accessed separately from the main gardens, across the street near the parking lot — get the entry code from the admissions gate when you arrive. The path is not stroller-friendly, so plan to babywear or carry little ones if needed. And note that the grove closes one hour before the main gardens, so plan your timing accordingly.

What Actually Helps Before Family Photos with Toddlers

Feed them. Seriously.

A hungry toddler is a miserable toddler. Eat a real meal before your session, bring snacks, and do not be shy about using them. Snacks are not cheating — snacks are strategy. Something they love, non-messy, non-sticky. Some of my favorite candid shots happen mid-snack: a blissfully happy kid, totally unaware of the camera, just living their best life.

Time it around naps

If your child still naps, schedule your session after they’ve slept. A well-rested toddler is a completely different creature than an overtired one. I typically shoot in the late afternoon for golden hour light anyway, which tends to line up perfectly with post-nap energy for most families.

Talk it up — but call it a playdate

Tell your toddler you’re going on a playdate somewhere fun. Not a photo session, not a big important day — a playdate. That word carries zero pressure and all the right energy. We’re going somewhere to play, run around, and have fun. Because honestly? That’s exactly what we’re doing.

Dress them in something comfortable

Itchy, stiff, or too-tight outfits are a recipe for a miserable toddler. Whatever you choose, make sure they can move freely and that it’s something they’ve worn before. A brand new outfit they’ve never had on can feel strange and distracting. Comfort photographs better than perfection every single time.

Let them warm up

Most toddlers need 10 to 15 minutes before they’re comfortable with a new person and a new environment. I build this into every session — we’ll start by just exploring together, no camera pressure, until they’ve decided I’m okay. Once they’ve decided, everything changes.

Go with the flow

Some of the most beautiful images from any session come from the unplanned moments — the meltdown that turned into a cuddle, the snack break that became the most connected five minutes of the afternoon, the running-away-from-camera shot that ended up being everyone’s favorite. Let it be what it is.

The Best Family Sessions Feel More Like Play Than Posing

Family photos with toddlers work best when they feel like an outing, not a shoot. My approach with every family is the same: I guide, I don’t direct. There is a difference. Directing sounds like “everyone look here and smile.” Guiding sounds like “dad, pick her up and spin her — go!” or “walk toward that tree, and just talk to each other like I’m not here.”

With toddlers specifically, the tools I reach for most often are snacks, simple games, and gentle distraction. Snacks ideally before and after the session rather than during — something non-messy, something they love. Games can be as simple as “run to that tree and back” or “can you find something yellow?” The goal is not to manufacture a moment but to create the conditions for real ones to happen.

For the Berkeley session, the tools were simple: twirls, running, hunting for the perfect rock or leaf, walking a fallen log like a balance beam, swinging. Each one bought us thirty seconds of pure unselfconsciousness — a child completely absorbed in a task, forgetting entirely that someone was watching. That’s all you ever need. And then, right on schedule, the Japanese Pool. The newts are reliably there in the early months of the year, and I knew exactly what would happen — a two-and-a-half-year-old crouched at the edge, watching their every move. Some moments you stumble into. Some you walk your clients straight toward. Either way, I am ready when they arrive.

During the Session: What to Expect from Me

I will never ask your toddler to say cheese

The forced teethy grin that comes from “say cheese” is not the photo you want to keep forever. It doesn’t look like your child — it looks like a small person performing on command. I use movement, play, and genuine interaction to get real expressions. I might ask them to chase you, whisper something silly in their ear, or just give them space to do whatever they’re drawn to. The smiles that come from that are completely different from the ones that come from being told to smile.

Please don’t point at the camera

I know it comes from the best place — you want them to look, you want the shot, you’re trying to help. But the moment a parent points at the camera a toddler’s natural expression disappears and gets replaced with either a blank stare or a performance face. Or we get a lot of pictures of you pointing at the camera. None of these are what you actually want. I promise I have ways of getting their attention that don’t involve pointing. Trust me and put your hands down. 😂

Let them lead

One of the most important things you can do during a session is follow your child’s interest rather than redirect it. If they want to throw rocks in the water, throw rocks in the water. If they want to run up the hill, run up the hill. I’ll be right there with you, camera in hand, capturing exactly what’s happening. The best shots almost always come from moments nobody planned.

Don’t apologize

I hear “I’m so sorry” at almost every single session with young kids. Your child running in the wrong direction, refusing to look at the camera, or having a moment of big feelings is not a problem. It’s a session with a real child and real children are exactly what I’m there to photograph. I have never once left a session without beautiful images — chaos, tears, tantrums and all.

The meltdown moment

It happens sometimes. And here’s what I want you to know: the photo of you scooping up your crying toddler and holding them close is almost always one of the most emotional and beautiful images from the entire session. The snuggle after the storm is real and raw and true — and it’s one of my favorite things to capture. Don’t panic when it happens. Just be there with them and let me do my job.

Put your phone away

This one is for you, not your toddler. Family sessions go by fast — faster than you expect — and the parents who are fully present rather than trying to capture their own behind the scenes content always have a better experience and better photos. I’ve got the camera covered. Your job is to be there with your family, enjoy the moment, and let yourself actually feel this. The phones can wait. This can’t.

Keep smiling — even when it feels chaotic

When your toddler is running in the wrong direction or refusing to cooperate, the natural instinct is to look stressed or frustrated. Try your best to resist it. Nine times out of ten, the toddler looks completely adorable in those moments — it’s the worried parent expression that takes the photo from great to just okay. Laugh, stay loose, and let me handle the redirecting. Your joy is contagious and it shows in every frame.

Why Connection Matters More Than Perfect Smiles

Ten years from now you will not care whether your toddler was looking at the camera. You will care that you can see how much they loved to run, how loud their laugh was, how small their hand looked in yours. You will care that you can remember exactly what it felt like to be in this season — the exhausting, beautiful, too-fast season of raising a young child.

The photos that age best are the ones that look like your actual life. Not a curated version of it, not a performance of it — your life, on a good afternoon, with your people, in a place that was genuinely interesting to your kids. That’s what I’m always trying to make.

Other Favorite Bay Area Locations for Families with Young Children

The right location makes an enormous difference when you’re photographing young children. Here are a few of my favorites across the Bay Area:

San Francisco — Golden Gate Park 

Golden Gate Park is one of those locations that rewards families who know where to look within it. The Japanese Tea Garden area, the Panhandle, the rose garden near the Conservatory of Flowers — each section has its own character and light, and together they offer more variety than almost anywhere else in the Bay Area. Children have endless room to run and explore, and the park’s mature trees create a canopy of soft, diffused light that photographs beautifully in every season. A natural choice for San Francisco families who want something lush and layered rather than coastal.

Oakland — Oakland Hills Redwoods

One of the most dramatic locations in the entire East Bay — towering redwoods, dappled light filtering through the canopy, and a sense of being completely removed from the city even though you’re minutes from it. Children find the scale of the trees genuinely awe-inspiring, and the light in the forest is soft and flattering at almost any time of day. A favorite for families who want something that feels wild and unhurried.

Alameda — Alameda Beach

My home turf and one of my absolute favorites for young families. Children come alive at the beach in a way that is impossible to manufacture anywhere else — the sand, the water, the open space. Alameda Beach is less crowded than most Bay Area beaches and has beautiful open light especially in the late afternoon. Perfect for toddlers who need room to move.

See more of my favorite Bay Area beaches for family photography

Piedmont — Dracena Park (Or your local park)

Tucked into a quiet Piedmont neighborhood, Dracena Park offers a combination of open grass and tree cover that works beautifully in almost every season. The shade makes timing more flexible than open locations, which is a genuine advantage for families with young children who can’t always do late evening sessions.

Read more here for a complete guide to Bay Area family photography.

Not sure which location is right for your family? I’ll help you choose based on your kids’ ages, your aesthetic preferences, and the time of year. That’s part of what I do.

The Chaos Is the Point

Every single one of my sessions with toddlers has produced beautiful images. Family photos with toddlers are not something to dread — they’re some of the most joyful, alive sessions I shoot all year.

The running and the refusing and the unexpected meltdown — all of it is true to exactly who your child is right now. In ten years you will look at those photos and remember exactly what this season felt like. Not the posed version. The real one.

Give yourself grace. If you leave feeling like it was a little chaotic, that’s completely normal. Wait until you see the photos. I have watched so many parents walk away from a session convinced it was a disaster and then cry happy tears when their gallery arrives.

BERKELEY FAMILY PHOTOGRAPHY

Ready to book a Bay Area family session? Get in touch here — I’d love to hear about your family.

Rebecca Pattison is a lifestyle family, maternity, and newborn photographer based in Alameda, California, serving the greater Bay Area including the East Bay, San Francisco, Marin County, and the Peninsula.